I apologize for the lack of Sue yesterday - I just never ended up getting around to updating, for various reasons. >_<; If I have time, today, I'll post two. ^^ On an unrelated note, I've made an Anti-X-men Evolution community, because ... yeah. >_o Anyway, on with the fic.

TITLE: The Sands of the Hourglass
AUTHOR: Sing

NAME(S): Jessica Sullivan
AFFILIATION: British nobility
HAIR COLOR: not mentioned
EYE COLOR: not mentioned
SPECIAL POSESSIONS: an hourglass pendant, that I assume will be usefull at some point later in the story.

HISTORY: Lives on an island in the Caribbean with her step-father, who arranges her to be married to a man she hates. He dies in her prescense, and ...

CONNECTIONS TO CHARACTERS: ... is thrown in jail - in the same cell as Jack. What a coincidence.

NOTES: This story has got to have the worst formatting and structure I have ever seen. I don't know if the author used a weird program to write it, or if she's OCD with the return key, but there's like three or four lines in between each "complete thought". It's written in a first-person perspective, but seems to be trying to immitate the person's thought process, so it's hard to tell what the heck is going on at any given time.

SAMPLE OF THE STORY:



How do you become a well-known Lieutenant? Kill all your superiors and don't promote yourself?

Hemmingway…the most boring but well-known Lieutenant in the Caribbean, who seemed to be an extreme anti-pirate ‘kill them all’ person for whatever the reason.

Maybe because that's his job? The British Navy was sent out there for the purpose of protecting colonies from the threat of pirates. There was a definate "kill or be killed" mentality among naval officers during that time.



Of course I secretly agreed with disgust the subject about those seafaring scum.

But your character is going to hook up with Jack anyway, so what's the point?

But I despised Hemmingway. And whatever Hemmingway did not like. I liked. So in front of him, I spoke highly about the courage and boldness of pirates, satisfied with a small wince or a cough from the man.



Short and pudgy, the familiar white haired wig on his obviously baldhead, the small goatee, small eyes, and those always-grinning fat lips. Always about money and some boring lecture about his dead wife. From the way he spoke of his dead wife, it may seem that he had been the one to murder her. I was almost sure.

I really think this person has no grasp whatsoever on Navy ranks. Men that old were either retired, or Admirals (or Commodores, depending on the situation). Lieutenant is a mid-way rank that most people got to during the end of their required service time. Generally, only people who wanted to make a career out of being in the Navy stayed on after that.



I shook my head



To fill my head with that dreadful man was far a wasteful thing to do.



Breathing out a small sigh, I stretched and froze to hear pounding footsteps stomping closer and closer to my door.



Expecting a knock on the door. I quickly stood waiting.



Without a warning the door swung open as widely as it could, presenting a tall lean figure casually leaning by the door’s frame.



My eyes narrowed.



Of course….who else?



“Richard- when will you learn to be a gentleman and knock before entering a lady’s room?” I exasperatedly spoke



Why was he smiling so widely?



My cheeks flushed angrily, amused was he?

Well, he might be, but the readers definately are not.





The fatefull ... uh, arrest.

Jack pretended to snore as a prison guard walked up to his cell, unlocking the gates.



Nimbly, he stood up, watching eagerly at the opening cell.



“Ah no you don’t” the guard spat, “You stay put, I have extra guards who aren’t afraid to shoot”



“Then why open the gates?” Jack asked slowly, jerkily looking at the open door- his freedom…



A sudden figure was pushed and had fallen next to him with a small thump.



“Have fun with you’re new cellmate” the guard snickered as he locked the gate again and whistled back upstairs.



“Well now, that’s interesting” Jack stared at the stairs where the guards had walked off.



Turning to his new prison friend, he squinted through the candlelight.



“Ye all right lad?”



A soft gasp came from the figure.



Jack’s eyes widened.



Well now, that’s interesting….

First of all, no lady would EVER be accused of murder unless she was caught in the act and there was irrefutable evidence. No one at that time thouhgt proper ladies were even capable of something like that. Even if they WERE accused, they would not be arrested. They would most likely be kept at home under close watch until a trial of some kind could be thrown together. The idea of such a high class woman being thrown in jail is rediculous.

Another thing - WHY can people not come up with ORIGINAL DIALOUGE for Jack? Is it THAT HARD? Sheesh.